Sometimes it feels flattering to be the go-to person for most tasks.  This shows that people think you’re responsible, dependable, and you deliver good work.  But what do you do when they give you too many tasks for you to handle?  What if they depend too much on you for most things?  If you answered “yes” to either question, you need to learn the art of saying “No”.

The Benefits of Saying “No”

• You get to free up your time -  especially important if you feel overworked.
• You can focus on the projects that are truly important or exciting to you.
• Other people will have to learn how to accomplish some of the tasks they want you to do.  This will result in a more productive office environment for everyone.
• You decrease any chances of people bothering you for the same request later.
• Most importantly, you get to assert your power of choice and people won’t treat you like a doormat.

When do you say “no”?

• If you won’t be paid enough for a project.
• If you’d rather do other things with your time.
• If you’re assigned to do something that is your major weakness.
• If the project doesn’t excite you.
• If, when assigned the project, you feel a large knot in your stomach and it’s not because you’re excited to begin.

How do you say “No”?

Simple, you begin with the word itself. If you need supplemental statements, you could use any of the following:

• Sorry, but I’ve got a lot on my plate right now.
• I don’t think I have the right background for that.  I suggest Jane because she’s had experience with those types of projects.
• Sorry, I really can’t attend, but I can ask John to fill me in later.

Personally, this is a skill I’ve to hone.  I often get too much work on my plate, and I don’t even enjoy all of the tasks I’m assigned.  Basically, I’ve narrowed down the psychological reasons why I have a problem saying no:

• People in a higher position pull rank when they see signs of hesitation or disagreement.
• I’ve shown skill in such a variety of tasks that I’m asked to do things that go even beyond my job description.  Even though this is good in some cases, no one has an unlimited source of mental and physical energy.
• Most people assume that my “I can do it!” attitude towards many hard obstacles means “I can and will do everything!”

By saying “no” once in a while, you are training people to respect your time and energy.  If they’ve gotten used to you saying “yes”, then now is the perfect time to reverse the cycle.  What’s the worst that could happen?  People will learn to do some things themselves or adjust their resources.  Not bad for a worst case scenario.

Are you good at saying “no” to tasks that seem to have no value for you?

Tags: corporate tips, office environment, office tips, saying no, workplace tips

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Filed under: Estates, Celebrity Shopping

It is fitting on Oscar Sunday to look at a building actually owned by an Oscar nominee, director Julian Schnabel. Schnabel directed the heartbreakingly beautiful motion picture “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.” This was Schnabel’s third motion picture (he also directed Basquiat and Before Night Falls).

I’m a bit biased about the case of Julian Schnabel. I’ve had a massive crush on him since first seeing his broken plate art in the 1980s. Since then as his ample frame has grown, so too has my affection. The prospect of seeing what he will wear to the Oscars makes me giddy after all he’s been known to show up at awards in a pajama top or in a tablecloth-like sarong. While lately his yellow-lensed glasses aren’t winning my heart, I love a man willing to flaunt a huge hairy chest.

The Schnabel is a genius and no one knows that superior than he does. His ego has also gained a fair bit of attention. Which brings us to Palazzo Chupi, the greatest monument to that ego. The building which is colored “Pompeii Red” but often photographs as pink has caused no end of controversy and speculation in New York’s West Village. Richard Gere and his model wife have bought in here as has a finance person from Credit Suisse. Rumor has it that both Bono and Madonna had considered but have decided against life at Chupi.

The NY Times has the listing for the $27 million duplex and Curbed has the floorplan for the penthouse triplex. There are details to love here. The homes have a very European feel and the Schnabel is a man with an accomplished eye so you get cast bronze door handles, lovely stone fireplaces and cast stone railings. The sense of space here’s lovely, I’m not sure of the ceiling height but there’s just a real expansiveness here. The chandeliers alone speak of a certain type of eccentricity.

There are also things not to love. The kitchen with it’s green tiles is just a wee bit too reminiscent of the types of older kitchens you usually have to destroy to build your dream kitchen. I know New York is a dine out city but still for that much money you want to be able to cook and or entertain in your kitchen. The basement pool, at least as shown in the recent issue of Vanity Fair, scares me, it states more horror movie than a place to do your morning laps. You aren’t getting that much space for your cash here either. The $27 million duplex offers 3,850 square feet and the $32 million triplex is 3,845 square feet. Not small but a whole lot of money for the size. What I want to know is how much Schnabel access the price purchases you. Do you get to hang out with him and his ethereally beautiful wife and his glamorous kids? Does he invite you to dinner celebrations and let you look at his paintings in progress? Because honestly, that’s the only way these apartments are actually worth the price.

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From the Wall Street Journal’s Private Properties:
–In Palm Beach, movie producer Sidney Kimmel, the founder and chairman of Jones Apparel, has put his oceanfront mansion up for sale for $81.5 million.
–After almost two years and $3 million in price cuts, Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne have given up trying to sell their Malibu beach house, shown above, (which is currently listed at $10.995 million) and are now renting it for long-term lease at $37,500 a month or for short-term lease in the summer at $85,000 monthly.

From the NY Post’s Gimme Shelter:
–The Milbank Mansion, the lavish townhome otherwise known as the Bob Guccione townhouse has officially gone to contract and Braden Keil’s sources say that the sale number may be under $50 million which is actually not bad for a 27-room, 22,000-square-foot, double-wide vintage home. Of course this makes us wonder what the final price will be for the Sloane townhouse which is currently listed at $64 million.
–News anchor Kaity Tong and her husband, Patrick Callahan, are finally moving back to their duplex penthouse in Chelsea which they left last summer when their home was discovered to have toxic mold. The developer of a condo project next door, Elad, though unsure if it caused the leak, offered to put the couple up at the Gramercy Park Hotel until the problem could be fixed.
–A vacant plot in desirable land in East Hampton is set to hit the market. The approximately 18-acre plot of vacant land bordering Lily Pond Lane and Apaquogue Road across the street from Steven Spielberg’s estate have applied for permits to subdivide the land. One broker states it could be worth $8 million an acre or more.
–The Bridgehampton estate of Lyor Cohen, the chairman and CEO of Warner Music Group, is about to be listed for sale, it’s about to be listed at around $9.5 million.

From the NY Observer’s Manhattan Transfers:
–Private equity boss Frederick Iseman and his ex-wife are dealing with the terms of their break-up, which promised that the ex-Mrs. Iseman would have lifetime use of the co-op. But Iseman has bought out the missus for $5 million then transferred ownership to trusts run by his family. He will also be paying her five yearly sums, adding up to about $10.5 million. The couple is also divvying up the furnishings and fine art including sharing join custody of the den lamp.
–More about the Sloane townhouse, the mansion was previously divided into 11 apartment units and it seems that luring out the tenants before the listing was no simple task.
–Dr. William A. Haseltine, the former chairman and CEO of the Human Genome Science pharmaceutical corporation,has paid $9.7 million for an 86th-floor apartment at the Trump World Tower.
–Dancer George Faison, who left Alvin Ailey’s company in 1969 to start his own troupe and is now the artistic director of the Faison Firehouse Theater in Harlem, has sold his West End townhouse for $5.95 million.

From Berg Properties Huge Time Listings:
–Oprah Winfrey has sold a 4,806-square-foot, 39th-floor penthouse in Atlanta’s Buckhead area for $1.8 million.
–Saxophonist Kenny G has paid $2.85 million for a four-bedroom house in Los Angeles’ Studio City area.
–Designer-developer Xorin Balbes has sold a six-bedroom “significantly rehabbed house” in the Bird Streets area of Los Angeles’ Hollywood Hills for $5.725 million.
–A four-bedroom house in Ojai that was recently owned by actor and director Harold Ramis, and that was designed by architect Wallace Neff, is on the market for $6.95 million. The listing indicates it has already gone to contract.
– A 2,867-square-foot home in Bel-Air that once was owned by Farrah Fawcett has sold for $3.608 million.
–’Gilmore Girls’ actress Melissa McCarthy has sold her 1,284-square-foot house in West Hollywood for $1.325 million.
–Dan Aykroyd has put another Los Angeles home on the market. This one is listed at $2.595 million. The listing is here.

From the NY Times Massive Deal:
–Brokers find interesting things sometimes when they show an apartment. Sharon E. Baum of the Corcoran Group walked in on a string quartet rehearsal when showing an apartment at 27 West 67th Street, owned by the estate of Albert Fuller, a harpsichordist. The duplex apartment had been used for decades as a musical salon and performance space, and while it was on the market, it was still being used for rehearsals. The sale of Fuller’s apartment will benefit the Helicon Foundation, which was founded by Mr. Fuller in the 1980s to support the early instrument movement. The apartment is listed at $2.975 million, the listing is here.

From the Real Estalker:
–Mariah Carey has picked up a four-bedroom home on Windermere Island in the Bahamas that was listed at $4.9 million.
–The Real Estalker Mama checks out the Wanamaker-Munn mansion which we mentioned back in December. The $33 million very grand and lovely home is full of beautiful spaces that evoke the spirit of old New York. The listing is here.
–The Real Estalker Mama reveals some floor plans from the monstrously costly One Hyde Park development in London.
–Louwana, the Palm Beach, Florida house belonging to the late Aimee de Heeren is available for lease at $90,000 per month. It sits on an ocean front parcel that sits next to the estate Donald Trump has on the market for $125 million.
–Artist/director Julian Schnabel has listed two apartments at his Palazzo Chupi building, a $27 million duplex and a $32 million triplex. It is our estate of the day later this day.
–San Diego Padres pitcher Randy Wolf, who recently purchased a home belonging to guitarist Slash has listed his Calabasas home for $4.25 million. Rumor has it that he might have already sold the home to another musician Richie Sambora of Bon Jovi.

From the LA Times Hot Property:
–Actress Teri Polo has listed her Manhattan Beach home for $2.559 million. The listing for the contemporary home is here.
–Frank Sinatra Jr. just bought a home in the Beverly Hills Post Office area for $4.1 million.
–A home that once belonged to Deanna Durbin, who in 1939 won “a special Oscar” along with Mickey Rooney “for their significant contributions . . . as juvenile players,” is now on the market at $10.5 million. The home was built in 1938 and has eight bedrooms. The listing is here.
–A West Hollywood home owned by Loretta Young and producer Tom Lewis for almost 30 years has come on the market for $2.985 million. The listing is here.

From AOL Real Estate:
–How to save while you splurge on your remodel
–Million dollar starter homes

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That’s right, folks.  It’s a “Han Solo Frozen in Carbonite” Executive Desk (from Tom Spina Designs).  When you’re working on this desk, you’ll feel any of the following:

• Evil.  After all, YOU captured Han Solo and froze him in carbonite!
• Glad.  Because someone else has it worse than you.
• No longer alone.  Because misery adores company.
• Anxious.  Princess Leia is bound to come rescuing him soon.  She’s the one pretending to be a bounty hunter.

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When I “retire” from my current job (in a few years) I’ll no longer have health insurance. I do have a small business, so I decided to look into health insurance for myself through my business. I’ve lots of questions, and I know just enough to be dangerous, but I also know this is an important decision for me. So, I thought I would share with you what I find in this process.

First, someone told me to check out EHealthInsurance.com to get a quote. I first went to their small business insurance page, but they wanted me to establish a Health Savings Account before I could get any information, so I changed to the individual section. There I was able to give them a minimum amount of information about me and my location, and I was given a list of rate quotes from several companies. (You might also want to try InsureLane.com; they have some other insurance companies on their list.)

The rates depended on the level of coverage and the deductible. I’m interested in a Health Savings Account because the deductible is pre-tax money. My first question was, “Can I keep my current doctor?” I was able to search the list of physicians for each company and found my doctor under each plan (that’s a relief). I noted the different types of plans (HMO, PPO, POS, etc.).

I also noticed that the A.M. Best rating for each company was listed. A.M. Ideal issues independent ratings of the strength of insurance companies. Is an A (Excellent) that much better than a B++ (Good)? Anybody know?

At this point, I have a couple of companies to look at. i would like to talk with a real person at several companies to ask some questions. I’m going to get recommendations from some friends who have selected small business and individual health insurance in the past few years, and I’ll report back to you next week. In the meantime, let me know what questions you think I should ask.

Tags: baby boomers, health insurance, health savings account, HSA

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Filed under: Estates

My mom, who moved to Florida last year from Massachusetts, states that in Florida everyone’s home looks like a furniture store. That’s definitely true of today’s estate, an extravagant 12,000 square-foot home located on 7.8 acres in Ocala, Florida. The home has six bedrooms total including a large master suite. The home includes a chef’s kitchen that leads to a family room with a beverage center, wine cellar, computer station and walk-in pantry. Outdoor areas include a pool, a lanai with a double-sided fireplace, tennis court and an outdoor kitchen. The upstairs left wing is an entire floor dedicated to entertaining with a game room, card room, billiards/family room, media room, exercise room, 1.5 baths and beverage center built from an air balloon basket. The upstairs right wing has three bedrooms and can serve as guest quarters or the children’s wing. The manor office has 30 foot ceilings, double-sided fireplace, a built-in library with special ceiling treatment and opens to covered lanai. The main guest suite is secluded and private on the first floor. No pictures of the bedrooms or baths on this one but I suspect they’re just more of the beige same. This home is listed at $5 million.

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Out on the flats of the prairie in Johnston, Iowa, sits this surprising home, a French-styled chateau plunked down into the heart of the midwest. This ten-year-old home presents an elegant exterior with it’s tree-lined driveway but inside it’s a bit quirky. You’ve got a sort of country kitchen, a dark wood study packed to the brim with fish and game trophies and antiques everywhere. The first floor public rooms have columns and some charming plaster details but then you’ve got my personal pet peeve, those round lights inset into the ceilings in the bedrooms which rather destroy the classic effect. The home is 8264 square feet and there are five bedrooms. The exterior includes a private pond and a swimming pool on 4.66 acres. It’s a lot of home for not that much money, it’s listed at $1.495 million.

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I was going to leave this one for the Sunday real estate round-up but a couple of you’ve mentioned it to me in the tips I decided to take a look at it a little early. And rightly so, a $64 million townhouse is worth a post to itself. The Henry T. Sloane mansion on East 68th Street in New York City would be the most costly townhouse sold in city if it sells for the asking price (a record of $53 million was set for the Harkness mansion in 2006). It’s not the most high-priced listing price, as far as I know, the penthouse at the Pierre listed for $70 million still claims that honor.

Why so much? Part of it is location, the townhouse is located just steps away from Fifth Avenue on the East Side. Part of it is size, the building has 18,500 square feet total spread out over five stories. Two of the stories have 17-foot ceilings. There are 15 bedrooms and 17 bathrooms, seven fireplaces, a ballroom and a rooftop garden. Part of the lure is the history and design, the mansion was designed by architect Charles Pierrepont H. Gilbert for Sloane, the heir to a furniture empire, in 1905. The home is classic Beaux-Arts style and five of the rooms have all their original details intact. The wood-paneled ballroom with original oil-painted murals is particularly noteworthy.

The real estate broker Paula Del Nunzio and Brown Harris Stevens, the real estate firm she works for, could split a commission of $3.8 million on the sale. These days it’s hard to predict just how a costly listing will behave. Some stay on the market for years until the right buyer with enough cash comes along. Some are snapped up almost immediately. This one, given the size, location and history probably won’t linger long.

[Thanks Lana and David]

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The Magnolia farm in Sonoma, California is the town’s oldest East Side home and is a registered historical landmark. It has also been given a very modern rehabilitation that’s a world away from its classic exterior). The home was built in the 1890s and has been owned by members of the Hearst family among other great California families. The property has a four-bedroom main house as well as a one-bedroom guest home. There’s also a swimming pool, outdoor barbecue and a one acre lawn with room for croquet, bocce and horseshoes. The property is almost ten acres total and includes magnolia, olive, fig and maple trees. An outdoor patio offers dining for eight. it is currently being used as a wine country rental that costs $12,000 a week (many more gorgeous pictures are available at the home’s rental website). It is listed at $5.495 million.

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Hard times have hit a couple of big South Florida condo projects with two major condominium developers having filed for bankruptcy last week.. Strada 315 LLC, the developer of Fort Lauderdale’s Strada 315, filed Chapter 11 after selling 48 of its 117 units. The 21-floor condo tower was selling off condos for between $230,000 and $600,000.Regions Financial Corp., the largest bank based in Alabama, originally lent $34.5 million to the project. About $16 million was paid off as the condos were sold but Regions wouldn’t extend the loan. The developers filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection last week, saying they owe at least $50 million in debts to this bank and other lending partners. The company will continue operating as U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Miami court reorganizes its debts.

Beach House Property LLC, which is connected to Beach Home Designed by Richard Meier, at 9449 Collins Ave in Surfside filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection on Friday. The 101-unit condo was set to be built on the property of the Beach Home Hotel and would offer 101 condos at prices starting at around $1.5 million. The company owes its 20 largest unsecured creditors $4.6 million.

What’s the future of these two projects? At Strada there are sales contracts on 51 of the remaining 69 units, but it is expected that some of these won’t close due to the current grim conditions facing South Florida condominiums. The situation for the Beach Home is even murkier. Apparently the project is way behind schedule and has according to a comprehensive article by Kevin Tomlinson of the South Beach Condo blog, been through several developers already. It’s a shame since the project, shown at left, is the first Meier project in the area and attracted a lot of attention when it was first announced.

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